Monday, November 30, 2009

August Photos from My Mom's Camera

Here are some of the pictures from my mom's camera when she was here in August and September. 

This is Samuel's dock number where he spent most of his life.

This is in Egleston's cafeteria.  Caleb just saw this picture and told me that he would pretend to be sick when he was at the hospital.  I didn't know that was what he was doing.  I do know most of the time at the hospital he was emphatic about being held.  I can tell by looking at this picture that Bryan and I were weary and anxious to get up to Samuel's side.

Can't you tell how happy they are to see each other?  This was Bryan's birthday, and I don't think we'd seen Caleb and Joel in 4 days.  The last time we'd seen them was when they finally got to go in and see Samuel and when we told them he was dying.

Here we are for Bryan's birthday celebration in the hospital cafeteria with my mom (left) and the Thiels (Dave, Colleen, Jonathan, and Emily).  I remember how hard this "party" was for me.  It took so much effort just to smile.  I was always so much more relaxed and at ease when I was beside Samuel -- even when things looked bad. 

More of Bryan enjoying his two healthy sons.  I don't think I will ever take healthy children for granted again.

This is in Egleston's beautiful garden.  I can see Caleb's need for us in this picture.  At this point, we had taken the boys back up to see Samuel for a second and final time, and my mom and the Thiels had gone to spend a little time with Samuel.  It was the last time my mom saw him alive, and the last time the Thiels saw him.  Samuel died less than 2 days later.

Tomorrow marks 4 months since Samuel's birth and about 3 months since his death.  (He died on the 31st, so there's no exact month marker this month.)  I miss him so much.


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  2. These are very special memories…thanks for sharing them! Also thanks for sharing so much of yourself on this blog. Your honesty and your relationship with God is truly inspiring even thru the grief of loosing Samuel.

    I remember this day too…As Mike and I came into CICU that day we saw you with your family and the boys…I remember the excitement of the boys as we finished washing our hands and then it was their turn. They were so happy to see their brother.

    I remember thinking in a place where we as adults walk in with fear and anxiety; it was refreshing to see a smile on a child’s face and happiness.

    I remember seeing you later in the garden with the boys...We enjoyed watching you all play. From afar it was a glimpse of normal for us while Susan was upstairs lying next to Samuel…and it was nice to see the smiling faces of the boys with their arms wrapped around your neck as I longed for that day again with Susan.

    What I remember most about both you and Bryan is that…You always held your head high and handled each new challenge with such grace. We think of your family often and you will always be in our thoughts and prayers…God Bless You!